Can you believe that we have already reached the end of the first month of the new year, 2025? How are you feeling about this next year in your life so far? If you’re like many people, you might have set some “New Year resolutions” for yourself—perhaps some goals you would like to achieve or some habits you would like to change. I hope you are making progress toward those resolutions.
Unfortunately, most people give up on their resolutions by the end of January, finding it hard to change the behaviors and patterns of the previous year. In my work helping people to grow physically, mentally, and spiritually, I find that people have a hard time with goal achievement because they don’t really understand how to do it. They think, “I will accomplish X, or I will stop doing Y.” Their intention is sincere, and they truly want to follow through, but it just doesn’t happen. So, what is going wrong?
First, people may not understand that only one thing can help them change habits and accomplish their goals—their brains. A thought about what they would like appears in their mind, and they know that this is something they truly want, but it doesn’t work out. They will often blame themselves for lacking “willpower,” but that is not the whole story. Yes, one must have the will to change, but something more than just desire is needed. All the expensive programs and products in the world won’t help if the brain doesn't change, too. If you want to make big changes and accomplish great things, you must know how to work with your brain. Here are a few tips on how to set or revise your resolutions so that your intentions work harmoniously with your brain:
1) Understand the brain’s plasticity. If you have developed a bad habit you would like to change, your brain has developed neuronal connections that support that habit. Likewise, if you have a goal, you must develop the brain pathways that support achieving that goal. Fortunately, your brain has a feature known as “neuroplasticity” that allows you to change your brain. However, it takes time to develop these new connections, around 21 days to make new behaviors and attitudes “hardwired” into the brain. See if you can use 21-day mini-goals to help support your brain for success.
2) Use your brain’s most powerful feature—imagination. Your brain will believe you can succeed if you can picture yourself succeeding in your mind’s eye. Studies have shown, for example, that kids learning piano can learn faster just by visualizing their fingers moving on the keyboard, and cancer patients have better outcomes when they picture themselves overcoming their disease. So, try the same thing with your goals—visualizing yourself with better habits or succeeding at a goal.
3) Know that the power of positivity is real for your brain. In the process of achieving goals, there are almost always moments of difficulty and discouragement. These difficulties are the most common reason that people give up. When you face these moments, instead of giving up, work to change your brain's negative emotional state. Visualize yourself overcoming your obstacles, and put a smile on your face, even if it initially seems a little fake. The act of smiling automatically triggers “happy hormones” that can help you get moving again.
4) Anchor your goals in your True Self. Too often, people’s resolutions are based on ego’s desires. Perhaps they want to lose weight to look good on the beach or succeed financially to gain social status or power. That might be enough, but your drive will be even stronger if you connect your goals to your sense of higher purpose. If you want to lose weight or exercise more, tell yourself, “I want to be healthy and strong to benefit humanity more.” Always ask yourself, “Who am I?” and “What is my higher reason for being born?” Connecting your goals to higher values will also help you avoid blaming your environment or others for your failures. Instead, your failures become a precious opportunity for self-reflection and growth, and you never lose sight of your pure, beautiful soul.
5) Keep your resolutions centered in the moment. Instead of focusing on how well you did yesterday, either losing hope due to failures or being prideful because of successes, always approach your goals in the present moment. Ask yourself constantly, “What can I do NOW to be the person I want to be?” If you ask this with sincerity, you will also feel the beauty of your True Self, above and beyond the fake ego self. Recognize who you are. See the blessings you carry and understand the profound value you and your goals bring to the world. You cannot help but feel gratitude and treat yourself with reverence, which, in turn, will keep you going toward your goals.
Even though January has flitted by in the blink of an eye, you are fortunate to have another New Year offering a second chance—the Lunar New Year, starting January 30. This is the year of the wood snake, which offers great inspiration for completing your goals since wood is associated with trees and great growth, and the snake, who sheds its skin, represents change and transformation.
If you wish to transform yourself, you must be willing to embark on a journey to discover new ways of being. Becoming a new human is like walking in an unfamiliar forest; you may reach a dead end where no path lies ahead, blocked by dense thickets and towering trees. If you stop there, however, the path ends. But if you take one more step into the unknown, a new path begins to form. As you carve out a way where none existed, you may eventually find yourself on a broad, open road. All pioneering efforts in this world have followed this principle. To find a path, you must first step out on the journey.
I hope to see you along the way.